Reading Response: The Second Circle - Voice

I really like the section at the beginning of this chapter that describes the voice we strive for as "direct, clear, free, and connected to us." However, it goes on to discuss of the tension in our bodies and habits we develop over the years can keep us from our Second Circle voice, which according to the text, "sounds as you really mean to sound." I thought the idea that the Second Circle voice sounds how we intend to sound was really interesting. It reminded me of when you first get a script or scene and some lines don't feel entirely natural coming out of your mouth yet, at least in my experience. Discovering how to speak the text naturally is part of connecting to your Second Circle voice. The text also discusses the commonplace exchange of "how are you?" and states, "This simple but important exchange is universal in all families and workplaces, but it is not effective unless you are speaking and responding in Second Circle voice." Often times, it seems we fall into the trap of the automatic response "I'm good" when anyone asks how we are. An automatic, disconnected response like this prevents us from having any sort of real Second Circle communication. I had an acting teacher once that challenged us to look whoever was asking us "how are you?" directly in the eye and respond truthfully, whether we were doing well or not. Because people are so used to the stereotypical "I'm good," this type of honesty often comes as a surprise. However, if you let yourself communicate honestly like that, then ask how they are in return, the person will be more likely to also respond in an honest way, which fosters truthful, Second Circle communication where both parties care what the other is saying. In considering whether I have a first, second, or third circle voice, I find that I lean more towards third circle, because I sometimes find my head jutting forward when I speak and I tend to push my voice. Sometimes I find people tuning me out and I will continue to talk to try to get their attention to no avail, in a controlling Third Circle manner. In looking through the exercises and suggestions to place you in Second Circle voice, I really liked the idea of imagining you are speaking to a good friend who is supportive of you and on your side in order to create movement, color, and relaxation in your voice.